Two days ago, my Sociology lecturer Dr. P. talked about love. Yes, love. A totally taboo topic in Sociology, notoriously unpredictable, irrational and constantly proving theories wrong. It was out of the syllabus, but many people stayed on to listen. Love has such a drawing factor, ever since the beginning of time.
But one thing that caught my attention was this. Some famous social scientist came up with the term the "Post-emotional Era", which was a term to denote how love and intimacy was changing with modernization and globalization. There were two kinds of love: Passionate Love and Romantic Love.
Passionate Love: Erotic attraction for someone, an emotional connection. (The Heart and Soul)
Romantic Love: An intellectual, conscious decision to care for another. (The Mind)
Then Dr. P. pulled a punchline, like he always does.
Question: The reason for so many divorces and break-ups?
Answer: Passionate Love doesn't last long, for emotions always have up and downs, and for some law of gravitation, is usually found to stay down most of the time. Romantic Love usually pulls through longer, being conscious after all, with a bit of effort here and there. Finally, a cognitive savior of marriages. But...
Punchline: People change their minds.
Love cannot be rational simply because people change their minds. Rationality demands for reasons, true love doesn't have any reasons. You change your mind because someone else seems better than your current beau, because you don't feel loved anymore, because you think you deserve better, because you want to have fun and you feel restricted. And usually the answer to unrequited love is a bit of disappointment, depression, dumps, but "Hey, move along." "Find someone else." "Try and love again." "You'll find someone better." But love CAN remain even after one has changed one's mind. Yes, we can finally acknowledge that the person we love is not good enough for us, not as wonderful as we thought them to be, not as fun. We CAN look at another and KNOW that he/she would be better for us. But even so, we can still find love from some other source that makes us love our partner for who he or she is.
Why do you still love her? I don't know.
Why did Jesus love me? I don't know. I don't think there is a reason for it. You can say that "because we are His people." I can say that you were so bloody screwed up He could have just made do with another bunch. Maybe He could destroy all humans and give the antelopes brains that wouldn't be so careless as to sin. You can say that "He had to because He is Love" and I'll reply with "What do you mean He HAD to? Who's God? You or Him?"
There is one more type of love. Pure love. Irrational love. Love without a reason. Love that makes the world go the correct direction when money is pushing it the wrong way. I don't think my love is exactly 100% pure. Maybe I'll forget her one day. Maybe I'll learn to love another. Maybe I'll find out that it wasn't true love at all. Maybe... maybe I'll even rationalize it and internalize that she really wasn't worth the trouble.
The turmoil in my heart is strange because my entire being is convinced that we'll never be together. My mind knows full well that my heart cannot take another rejection like this. My soul can find no reason to risk loving you at the expense of my faith. My strength is zapped trying to prove to myself that I'm better than him for you, or for anyone else. But... a force contradicts all these "truths".
I dunno why I love. Believe me, I've tried to stop myself. But the more I try, the stronger it burns.
I just finished a conversation with someone I've been praying for for a long, long time. Lord, You really answered my prayers, even after making me wait for so long. It's in Your timing Father. Allow me to speak only the words that come from You. +)
Doesn't it occur to you how Love strangely seeps into everything that we see in life? Maybe that's what they mean when they say that God is omnipresent. -Valentino Casanova
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